Wednesday, February 23, 2011

WHY POPE BENEDICT XVI CLARIFIES, REAFFIRMS, REINFORCES AND DEFENDS CELIBACY?

Guess who is the handsome lad in this photo? None other than our beloved Pope Benedict XVI. And who would ever think that such a handsome young man would choose to live a holy life and become the Pope one day? With his good looks all the girls in town would queue up for him and gladly do anything for him. But our Pope Benedict said "No" to the beautiful young ladies of his time and took up his cross to follow Christ. Today, Pope Benedict XVI is one of the greatest heroes of our time. A man with good looks and great intelligence who has attained perfection in life - Pope Benedict XVI is a living example of the beauty and importance of priestly celibacy.


Why does Pope Benedict XVI reinforce and defend celibacy? Our Pope is a wise man and he certainly has good reasons for that. According to him, "The true foundation of the priest's life, the ground of his existence, the ground of his life, is God himself. Celibacy is a great sign of faith, of the presence of God in this world. When God is no longer central to a priest's life, he loses his zeal. In a world where the 'now' of the present and tangible seems good enough, celibacy is a great scandal. Celibacy seems difficult to understand in an agnostic world in which God doesn't enter the picture," in which "we no longer think of a future with God, because the presence of this world seems sufficient. Celibacy is an anticipation. To live the celibate life is to acknowledge the presence of God, the certainty of the next life, and the value of both. A priest is drawn into the life of Christ, including Christ's condition after the resurrection, so celibacy is an anticipation of this new world ... in which we are beyond matrimony. Through the priestly life of celibacy, the future breaks into today. Celibacy opens the door to this great truth of faith by living the future as if it is already in the present." We certainly cannot deny the fact that there is truth in every word that he says. However, in this materialistic world not many could accept this great truth of faith as illustrated in the examples below.

On the first day of Chinese New Year this year, I saw a church member giving an angpow (a red packet containing money) to a priest. Without even looking at its contents, this priest put the angpow into the donation box. What does this mean? Money and material things have no importance to this celibate priest. He does not have to go for expensive holidays with his wife nor does he need money to pay for his children's college fees. His whole life is filled with God and this we can see by the way he lives his life. As what Pope Benedict XVI says, "With the eschatological life of celibacy, the future world of God enters into the realities of our time." A priest who is living in the future world of God as though it is already in the present is more interested in living a holy life than gathering earthly wealth and indulging in carnal pleasures. And of course this is the kind of priest that our Pope would like to have in the Catholic Church - a priest who makes us feel proud of the Catholic Church and makes us want to be Catholic.

On the other hand, there is this married Indian pastor who keeps saying to everyone that "Pastors serve God by serving people." Well, this sounds good but is it really as good as it sounds? You should have seen how he polishes the shoes of the rich men in his church. But lo and behold! When a poor lady came to him to seek help (albeit a very minor one) he ignored her and purposely did not take her calls. What do I mean by "purposely"? This lady told me she called him countless times but he did not answer her calls. Don't tell me that this pastor did not use his mobile phone for weeks. Why is it so? The rich businessmen can give him big angpows and provide good employment for his children in their companies whilst the poor lady has nothing to offer him. He needs money to give his family a comfortable life. With his children growing up, he needs money to send them to college. When his children have graduated from college, he needs to seek the help of the rich men in his church who can provide good job opportunities for his children. Who is this pastor serving? God or his family?

I know of a retired Chinese primary school headmaster who during his days as the headmaster of the school got to know many company directors in the Parents and Teachers Association. What kind of man is he? Well, it depends on whom he is dealing with. If you are rich and famous, he would polish your shoes but if you are poor and lowly, he would look down on you. After his retirement, he worked for one of the directors and bought the most luxurious car he ever had in his life. And of course his children had good job offers from these directors too after they graduated. We cannot blame the pastor and the headmaster though as what they are doing is to be expected of every married man . Family firstlah. This is human nature. In Malaysia, we have politicians who leap from one political party to another. Why is it so? Because the pasture on the other side is greener. Well, there is nothing wrong with that. It is only natural that people should think of themselves and their families first. A priest, however, should be different from all the Toms, Dicks and Harrys on the streets. If he is as selfish as the pastor, headmaster or politicians aforementioned then what is so special about him?

When the 'now' of the present seems good enough and the presence of this world seems sufficient and when people no longer think of a future with God, carnal pleasures and material things become very important to them. In fact, this is what the world is all about today. According to Pope Benedict XVI, "The great problem of the West is the forgetfulness of God and this forgetfulness is spreading." In actual fact, not only the West but almost the whole world is infected with this forgetfulness disease. Those who have forgotten about God tend to live only for themselves and only for the present as there is no future without God. Sad to say, sex has become more important than God in the world of today. This clearly explains why not many men can become celibate priests today. That's why Pope Benedict XVI is having a tough time defending celibacy!

People tend to create their own values and pass their own judgment to accommodate their own selfish purposes. Values change with time and in a way our world has changed a great deal since the time of Jesus. If that was too ancient, let's not talk about the time of Jesus but Father Damien's time instead. During those days, the priests did not pester the Pope to allow them to get married. They served God and His people faithfully. Father Damien was ready to die for the lepers just as Jesus has died for us. But nowadays, we have priests who want the best of all worlds - a wife, children, and a respectable "job". These are their conditions for joining the priesthood. They cannot take up the cross and follow Jesus as long as they cannot benefit from it. The cross is too heavy for them. Just because they cannot live the life of Christ, celibacy has become a scandal to them and they keep pestering our Pope to change the rules of the Church for them and allow them to get married. When they found that the Church couldn't satisfy their selfish desires, they left the Church to get married. Of course there are those ex-Catholic priests who go to the extreme of writing books trying to justify themselves portraying themselves as victims as though the Church has wronged them. But are they really victims? In actual fact, it is the Church that is being victimized by them for they have betrayed the Church by their hypocrisy. Why take the vows of chastity, poverty and obedience when they cannot keep them? No one forces them to do it. As what Pope Benedict XVI says, "Celibacy is not a matter of compulsion. Someone is accepted as a priest only when he does it of his own accord."

Pope Benedict XVI has always defended the value of priestly celibacy.in the Catholic Church

To say that they have to make a choice between faith and love is rubbish. If a priest really loves Jesus and intends to serve the Church faithfully just as our Lord has done, this question does not arise. If he is determined to follow Christ and has sincerely chosen the way of the cross nothing could make him change his mind. To say that the woman that he has fallen in love with shares the same passion for Jesus as much as he does is also rubbish. If the woman has a strong passion for Jesus she would not tempt a priest to jump into bed with her. Just imagine how much time and money the Church has wasted on these ungrateful priests who later become traitors?

Father Damien has lived in my heart since I was a young child. I become Catholic because of him and I model every priest after him. Each time I look at a celibate priest, I feel so proud of him because his life is a reflection of the life of Christ. But then values change with time. We now have priests who enjoy premarital sex and behave like sexually obsessed teenagers on the beach whilst the paparazis are busy taking photos. A priest who has the guts to have sex with his girlfriend on the beach (or elsewhere) after taking the vows of chastity does not deserve our respect at all. This idea reduces men to animals as they cannot live without sex.

A priest is supposed to set a good example to the world but what if he himself is not much better than a sexually obssessed teenager? What is he preaching then? What kind of example is he setting to the world? Is he trying to prove that premarital sex is fine and that caressing and kissing a woman vigorously on the beach is a good thing to do? What does the Bible say about premarital sex? Is it okay for a priest to do it? Maybe he has really "lost his zeal" as what Pope Benedict says and therefore the presence of this world seems sufficient to him. Be it rain or shine, sex must come first. But then, he must also have a good job or how is he going to survive? This is his 'dilemma'. He must be given the best of all worlds or he wouldn't become a priest. Pope Benedict XVI is right. This kind of priest is only living for the present thus forgetting about his future with God. That's why he is so concerned with carnal pleasures and tangible things and lives for the "now" of the present.

There is a malay "gurindam" which sounds something like this: "Jika guru kencing berdiri, anak murid kencing berlari. Jika guru kencing dalam keretapi, murid kencing dalam LRT." Let me translate it. It means that if the teacher pisses while standing, the students piss while running. If the teachers pisses on the train, the students piss on the Light Rail Transit." Priests are supposed to be more important than teachers as they have greater influences on our lives than the teachers. But what if the priest enjoys premarital sex on the beach (or perhaps elsewhere)? Of course many people would emulate him assuming that since a priest can do it then it's the right thing to do and this would only worsen the situation in our already morally decadent world. Can such a priest be a good Church leader? No, I cannot let him lead me. Better stay at home and preach to myself. I cannot tolerate the ugly things that he does. What a shame! It's a good thing Pope Benedict XVI doesn't allow this kind of priest to remain in the Church as he would only bring dishonour to the Church.

During the time of Jesus, premarital sex is almost unheard of. An unmarried woman found pregnant would be stoned to death. But values change with time and when everyone is doing something even though it is wrong, it becomes right. It seems that it is okay for a priest to have premarital sex today. Many people say that he is right and that Pope Benedict XVI is wrong and that the Pope should change the rules of the Church to accommodate his sexual desires. But our beloved Pope knows what is best for our Catholic Church. He doesn't want the priesthood to become an occupation and a money making channel for the family men priests. He doesn't want to have priests who are busy serving their wives and children at the expense of the Church. He doesn't want sexually obsessed priests who after enjoying premarital sex on the beach preach about Jesus and holiness in the Church. The Church is a holy place and not a sexual cult. A priest must walk his talk. He doesn't want priests who cannot live the life of Christ. He doesn't want materialistic priests who only believe in the present and who have forgotten about God. He doesn't want priests who treat the parishioners like their stepchildren because they have already had their own biological children.

What does our beloved Pope Benedict want? Holy priests like Father Damien, Father OC Lim and Father Slavko Barbaric just to mention three examples. Priests who can devote their entire lives selflessly serving God and His people. Priests who can set good examples to the world. Priests who are not keen in accumulating wealth for the sake of their families. Priests whose lives are filled with God and not carnal pleasures or material things. The Catholic priesthood is a vocation and not an occupation for the jobless men on the streets. Having a married priesthood would mean that every Tom, Dick and Harry on the streets can become a priest. What is so unique about the Catholic priesthood then? The fact that the Church only chooses bishops from among their celibate, unmarried priests clearly indicates that there is an inherent value in the nature of celibacy.  To those young men who can live holy lives and travel the path that Jesus has traveled more than 2000 years ago, why not join the priesthood and save our Catholic Church? Remember, a good priest does not ask himself what benefits he can get as a priest. He will ask himself what he can do for the Church.

If I were born a man I would have become a priest a long time ago. The celibate priesthood is a beautiful journey with the Lord. There are lots of things that I could have done for the Church if I were a priest! (Those who like this article may also want to read "Should Catholic Priests be Allowed to Marry" and "Taxi Driver Wanted to Become a Married Catholic Priest").

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

SHOULD CATHOLIC PRIESTS BE ALLOWED TO MARRY?

Priestly celibacy has been guarded by the Church for centuries as a brilliant jewel, and retains its value undiminished even in our time when the outlook of men and the state of the world have undergone such profound changers - POPE PAUL VI, SACERDOTALIS CAELIBATUS

I would like to begin with some quotations from the Bible:

Everyone who has given up home, brothers or sisters, father or mother, wife or children or lands for my sake will receive a hundred times as much in return and inherit eternal life (Matthew 19:29).

A man is better off having no sexual relations with a woman (1 Corinthians 7:1).

I tell you dear brothers and sisters, the time is short. From now on, those who have wives should live as though they had none (1 Corinthians 7:29).

I would like you to be without care. The unmarried man is busy with the Lord's affairs and concerned with pleasing the Lord; but the married man is busy with the things of the world and occupied with pleasing his wife. This means his interests are divided (1 Corinthians 7:32-33).

What do these quotations mean? These are beautifully explained in one of the "Quote for Priests" from Father Anthony Ho's blog that I would like to share with my readers. Here it goes:

It is true, one reason why the Church requires celibacy in her priests is that one who is free from the cares and responsibilities of family life can more completely and wholeheartedly devote himself to the work of the sacred ministry. But the deeper and more spiritual reason is that the soul which is free from the bonds of earthly love, however noble and pure it may be, is better disposed for an ardent and unselfish love of God.

One cannot deny the fact that celibate priests can devote themselves completely and wholeheartedly to the Church since they are free from the burdens and responsibilities of family life. Truly, priestly celibacy is a blessing bestowed upon the Church and celibate priests are our greatest gifts from God - so rare, valuable and precious. They are another Christ (Alter Christus), men taken from among men to serve and lead the Church through their priestly ministry. They are selfless and holy men who offer their whole humanity to God for our salvation. The priestly vocation is not a job or a career but a calling - it requires lots of sacrifices. Since celibacy is an altruistic act, not many men can take a lifelong vow of celibacy because only those with a heroic soul can afford to do that. I pray that God will grant us more celibate priests who will walk in the footsteps of Jesus to serve the Church. In this morally decadent world, those who can relinquish sex are hard to come by and that is why our celibate priests have become our priceless treasures today.

I have never had sex before and I don't know how enjoyable or important it is. But I do know that it certainly has got nothing to do with holiness, purity and chastity. Here I would like to share a real life story that my grandmother used to tell me when I was still a little girl. This is how it goes: When my uncle got married, someone gave him a wooden crucifix. He hung it on the wall just above his marital bed. Both my uncle and his wife suddenly fell ill but they didn't know what was wrong. They just coudn't get well. When my grandmother visited them, she saw the crucifix in their bedroom and suggested that they should remove it and put it elsewhere. After removing the crucifix from their bedroom, my uncle and his wife were immediately healed from their mysterious illness. Whether it is a coincidence or not, having sex in front of Jesus doesn't seem to be the right thing to do. If sex is something which is holy, pure and chaste, then, why not have sex in the Church?

Would the Catholic Church be better served if priests were allowed to marry? No doubt a celibate priest can offer his entire self and devote all his time to the service of God's people but a married priest would be unable to give himself fully to the Church as he tends to get bogged down with earthly things. If he gives more importance to his wife and children and puts them above everything else, there would be conflict between his spiritual and familial duties. With a family to support, he will also ask for more money but can the pay raise increase his work performance? According to Patricia Dixon, the wife of a former Protestant pastor in her article entitled "Why a Married Priesthood Won’t Remedy the Priest Shortage" (summarized below):

Supporters of a married clergy should consider the realistic consequences of their optimistic views. For instance, let's consider a typical, moderately large parish in a rich community in America where three priests are living in a rectory which houses the parish office. What would happen to this parish if these three priests were married? Needless to say, the parish would need a few more priests because married priests cannot give all their time to the Church as their families are their top priority. This would mean that the parish may end up having five or six priests instead of three, thus leaving no sensible solution to the priest shortage even if the number of priests were to double in America following the abolition of celibacy rules. To keep their families above the federal poverty line, those married priests would need a salary raise of three times their current earnings. Of course, we cannot expect those six families to live in that rectory with the parish office in the home of one of them. So, they would need six houses and more space elsewhere instead of just one rectory. Therefore, supporting six married priests and their families will cost the parish more than six times of what it used to spend on three celibate priests. The priests may also have to take on second jobs to boost their income and would have less time to serve God and His people. So, even if the parishioners could support their six priests, they will still lack priestly attention. Every married pastor has to face the tensions of meeting the needs of the Church versus the needs of his family since both the Church and his family demand half of his time and energy. The church members may also feel uncomfortable when the pastor's wife gets pregnant as she is the living symbol of his active sex life.

How right she is! Patricia Dixon's article, Why a Married Priesthood Won't Remedy the Priest Shortage, does have a lot of truth in it. Well written, precise and straight to the point, it tells us what exactly will happen to the Catholic Church if priests were allowed to get married. Jesus was pure and chaste and he was free from worldly anxieties as he did not have to worry about how to make more money to give his wife and children a comfortable life. What would be the fate of Christianity if Jesus were busy working multiple jobs to earn extra money for the sake of his family? 

Can a married priest give all his time and energy to the Church? During my college days, I used to visit a home for the former drug addicts and it was fun chatting with them and playing table tennis with them. We also washed the dishes together after lunch. When I asked them how often their pastor (who were caring for people with drug addictions) visited them, they told me that he seldom came to see them after he got married. And after his first baby came, they saw even less of him. What does this suggest? That a married pastor will put his family first and and in doing so, he has to neglect his pastoral duties. Like all married men, a married priest wants to finish his work fast and go home early to be with his wife and children. He cannot be late because he has to fetch his children from school and drive his wife to the supermarket to shop for groceries. And of course he shouldn't miss dinner. His wife doesn't like that - family meals are important for family bonding. Thus the priesthood seems to be more like an occupation to him - a 9-to-5 job that provides him with an income to support his wife and children. And a married man is particularly happy when he sees the happy faces of his wife and children receiving unexpected presents. That is why church members like to buy gifts for their pastors' family members. According to one of my former classmates, her pastor is exceptionally kind and friendly to all those who always buy presents for his wife and children. These presents are not cheap - his son got a bicyle recently from one of the church members! But of course we cannot blame the pastor. He certainly wants the best for his wife and children even if it is at the expense of the church members.

A married man is always busy thinking of ways to increase his income because he wants to give his wife and children a good life. With a family to support, money will never be enough. His wife and children may want him to purchase luxury items for them such as jewelry, watches, smartphones, Birkin bags, or even a sports car and a new mansion. If a priest is only concerned with making money to give his wife and children a comfortable / lavish life, the priesthood is no longer a vocation but some kind of occupation or money making institution for a family man. Can anyone imagine what would happen if we have priests who are always busy doing direct selling (such as Amway or Cosway products) in the Church together with their wives? Business would be good for sure because of the church members' support since many of them treat their pastors like God. But is this the kind of priests we can honor, respect and love?

On the contrary, a celibate priest has all the time in the world to do God's work. He doesn't have to be on time for dinner with his wife and children. He doesn't have to keep thinking that he must finish his work fast so that he can go home early. He doesn't have to think of ways to increase his income. And most of all, he can devote all his time to the parish and the parishioners will never find themselves short of priestly attention. As such, the priesthood is only suitable for those men who are ready to live the life of Christ and willing to devote their entire lives to walk in His footsteps.

How would the church members feel when the pastor's wife gets pregnant? To answer this question, let me share what my classmates used to do whenever a teacher got pregnant. Well, the things they said were so funny that the whole class would burst into laughter because their minds were so imaginative. Today's children are the same - not only will they joke about their teachers' pregnancy in class, they will also make their remarks on Facebook. If school children can be so imaginative, what about the congregation in church especially when the pastor's wife's baby bump is a symbol of his sexual activities?

We call a priest Father. Can we marry our own father and have sex with him? Priests are supposed to live the life of Christ. But is the life of a married priest a reflection of Christ's life? Christ is celibate and he was ready to die on the cross for our sins because it was His Father's will. Had Jesus ever said, "Father, please spare me my life. I want to take care of my wife and see my children grow up. I can't die on the cross. Family firstlah." If these were His words, Christianity wouldn't have existed at all!

There is no such thing as the Church denying the priests the human rights to get married. Priesthood is a choice and the vows of chastity are to be taken freely. Those who feel that they cannot live the life of Christ can always get married and get a job elsewhere to support their wife and children. They don't have to keep eyeing the priesthood and pestering the Pope to change the rules of the Church for them. No doubt it is not easy to get a respectful and secure job that can provide well for their families during this period of recession but it should be remembered that the priesthood is a vocation and not an occupation. If they really love to help out in Church, they can always come to Church to lend a helping hand. Many lay preachers are doing that free of charge in Malaysia.

Should priests be allowed to get married then all the jobless men on the streets would be fighting for this job. Where on earth can they find such a respectful and secure job nowadays? Their wives and children would be well provided for by the Church and live a comfortable life. Who doesn't want that? Of course there would be no more shortage of priests when the Roman Catholic priesthood becomes an occupation!

Who says that celibate priests cannot give advice on family matters? The capability to give advice does not depend on whether they are married or not. I give advice and help to single mom, divorcees, and women suffering from broken relationships to help them live their lives again. I don't have to be a divorcee or a single mother or suffer from some kind of broken relationship to do that. I may never have been married or fallen in love before but this does not deter me from observing and analysing the world around me and learn from the experiences of others. I also give counseling and help to rape victims but this does not mean that I have to be a rape victim myself! Celibate priests understand the sacrificial nature and sanctity of marriage in a way that few married men could do and are certainly better counselors in the ways of keeping the wedding vows and maintaining a good marriage relationship (including fidelity in marriage) compared to married priests. 

Who says that married men would not get involved in sex scandals? Maybe some of you would have read about the case of Ahmad Najib - a married man who raped, killed, burnt and chopped off the legs of the beautiful Canny Ong. He was sentenced to death. No doubt he was married but this did not deter him from raping another woman. Then there was Lily Chua's case back in 1993 where the pastor turned music teacher, murdered her and cut her into eleven pieces before he dumped her body parts in a drain and a ravine. Fearing that his wife would discover his affair with Lily Chua, the pastor had no choice but to kill Lily Chua and then destroyed her body completely so that no one would discover his extra-marital affair. The pastor was sentenced to 12 years in prison but was released from prison after 8 years because of good behavior. Extra-marital affairs are so common nowadays. When a man is married it doesn't mean that he wouldn't be interested in another woman. Most sexual abusers are not celibate. It's licentiousness that breeds sexual abuse, not celibacy! 

Sexual abuse in Protestant Churches is not uncommon and many pastors in the various Protestant denominations have turned out to be sexual predators as well even though they are married. The case of the pedophile pastor, Dawid Volmer (a married father-of-two), who has been jailed for more than 10 years for raping a 13-year-old girl and stupefying her with amyl nitrite vapour, as she was lying naked and blindfolded on a bed, is a very clear example of this. And of course one cannot deny the fact that there have been many arrests involving Protestant pastors who were charged with sex crimes. Please read CORRUPT RELIGIOUS LEADERS: PASTORS AND SEX CRIMES to find out what Protestant pastors can do to their sex victims. These 40 cases are amongst some of the pastors' sexual abuse cases reported to the authorities and the media from October 2017 to January 2018. How come no one is making a fuss over the wicked things that Protestant pastors did to their sex victims? Is it because they are married and it is alright for married men to do such things?  In Horus Gilgamesh's “25 MORE SHOCKING ARRESTS”: PASTORS CHARGED WITH SEX CRIMES, out of the 25 sex crimes involving pastors that hit the local news in May 2014, only one of the perpetrators was Catholic. What about the rest? Your average Protestant pastors that no one would have ever suspected of being sexual predators preying on vulnerable women and children! Celibacy is therefore not to blame for sexual abuse in the Catholic Church as the problems of sex abuse are greater and more serious among Protestant pastors. It seems that married Protestant pastors have stronger sexual needs and are more obsessed with sex than unmarried priests.